Strive at what cost ?

It came into light a question that should be posted.

I'm striving in this life to make a life worth living. In order achieving certain goals and objectives set, I must do and be willing to amend some values and believes. But then to strive at what cost?

Anything that worth striving for, must it comes at a cost of something? Why? How do one quantify the cost? What can be expected if without? How could I relate to those cost? Minimizing the cost? Can one bare to suffer the cost?

All I know that, I on my part have paid some terrible cost for what I'm striving for. And it is has been killing me on the inside. It has killed what I have built and fought for.

What went wrong there? Was it my method dictates it or my tenacity in holding the damned fort? I am for one have never abandoned in what I believe for. So, what differentiates me from the rest who is doing like I am but never really much in paying a terrible cost? Moreover, much rewarding it was to some other people. Talking about fairness, my ass....

Come next maybe is our way of tackling things and managing it to our will and comprehensions. Flexibility is the key maybe. Either it is to our likings or not, we still have to deal with it. No choice be given. It is a problem for everyone to ponder. Some do give in and some do not. They are some can't make up their mind to which to do...

Am I trapped in my own doings? ... And I thought all this while that my life is simply simple-dimple, merry-dory all the way. Of course with some little obstacle, trials here and there along the way but never have I anticipated before it could get this ever worse. Or is there much more worst as in grandiose worst than the current situation?

Life is simple if choose to be, but it is also in actual fact is not that simple. With other X factors influencing our livelihood and our mindful thinking, it is never that simple. Though it seems that simple and easy. Everything in this life has always comes in pairs. The good and the bad. The other side of the story and the other side of the coins. We must accept as it is. God has made it in such way for balance of all I supposed.

God surely gives us what we needed the most without we realizing and mostly we do not see the value of appreciating it most. There are times we are boggle to understand and comprehend what is made and gives by HIM.

In any case, I will keep pondering and wondering the answer. I will keep it close to my heart of which the games of life I'm playing with. Damned me if I failed in those things that I'm supposed to do.

It's a funny world we live in. Speaking of which, I am in a borderline mood and perseverance at the stake of spiritual endeavors.

And I think the Joker have said it brilliantly the best of all.

It wasn't hard. See. Madness, as you know is like gravity. All it takes is a little push...

So... next question is, who is that would be my little push ?

Like a puzzle, trying to figure out the puzzling game and finding the right piece of the puzzle connecting linking everything until it does make sense all the way till the end of my existence.

Do note that, this is just me muzzling my opinion and thought, challenging myself, daring myself. Validating myself having a part in this world.

Be careful to what you wished for...